(( I was desperate, okay? Enjoy this conversation between two of main characters, in which repetition ensues and contractions are completely rejected, copied from the Camp NaNoWrimo novel document of yours truly. ))
Lyra and Maddie exchanged a glance of relief before finishing their breakfast. After a long moment of silence, they began to talk. “Hey, Lyra, what do you think is better? Cupcakes or muffins?” Maddie asked curiously. Lyra raised an eyebrow in confusion.
“Uh, why do you want to know, exactly?” Lyra replied, puzzled, as she stuffed a piece of her scrambled eggs in her mouth. Maddie shrugged and did the exact same thing that Lyra had done with her scrambled eggs, chewing it slowly and carefully as she did so.
“I do not know. I just want to. It is a pretty legitimate and debatable topic for a conversation, am I right?” she said, grinning as she ate. Lyra rolled her eyes and continued to eat, completely ignoring her question. “Oh, come on! Please, just answer!” Maddie insisted persistently.
“Cupcakes, I think. Wait, I do not know, I think um, maybe, uh, muffins. Wait, no! I really do not know. Aren’t muffins just cupcakes without all the icing and sprinkles and extra happiness?” Lyra replied, raising an eyebrow at her again.
Maddie looked offended. “Of course they aren’t! That’s terrible! Muffins deserve as much love as cupcakes do, even if they aren’t as exciting and happy looking and all that other jazz. They are amazing! I especially like blueberry muffins, but I think cupcakes are just...better.”
Now, Lyra looked even more offended. Her jaw dropped at her auburn haired friend and she put her fork down loudly on her plate. It made a loud screeching noise as it did so. “Okay, now I am defending the muffin family. Muffins are super duper amazing, like you said, but they are just...they are nicer! They are less messy and they do not have really sticky icing that gets all over your fingers. It gets really annoying when the icing gets on my fingers, too. I know that most people do not really care and just lick the stuff off, but it’s different for me! It’s just a really weird and actually, rather big and extraordinary pet peeve that I have.”
Maddie seemed to stop eating and crossed her arms over her chest, angry at Lyra’s replies. “Even though cupcakes can get really sticky and messy and get all over your fingers, and they can get super crumby and stuff, they are just better tasting in general. The icing makes it nicer and it’s fun to just lick off instead of eating the entire thing. The sprinkles are really fun and delicious. Muffins are a disgrace to the food chain!” She insisted.
“No, they are not! Cupcakes are more of a disgrace to the food chain than muffins are!” Lyra replied stubbornly. “Cupcakes are seriously unhealthy most of the time. They have way too much icing, the sprinkles are overused, and sometimes people put ice cream or pudding or tapioca or something else like that! Muffins are just sort of like...fun, tastier bread! And they are shaped differently! Different shapes are cool!”
Maddie looked disgusted by Lyra’s speech. She ate some of the rest of her breakfast and looked at the thirteen year old girl before her. “How could you say that? Cupcakes may be unhealthy sometimes, but they are seriously amazing and I am pretty sure that I can name at least five people who would prefer cupcakes rather than muffins any time now!”
“Unhealthy sometimes?” Lyra scoffed, rolling her eyes and eating more of her breakfast as well. “They are always unhealthy, if you have not noticed, Madeleine Smith! They are filled with sugar and sprinkles and icing and all that unhealthy stuff that parents usually do not let their children eat too much everyday!”
Maddie only rolled her eyes. “You are just jealous because you know that muffins are not that good, anyway. Muffins are just complete rip offs of cupcakes, you know. They are the boring, dull, monotonous, disgusting, untasty, bland, yucky, unbelievable, bitter, tasteless most of the time, and seriously salty versions of cupcakes.”
Lyra finished her breakfast and looked at her, astonished that she would say such a thing. “First of all, muffins are not, at all, boring, dull, monotonous, disgusting, untasty, bland, yucky, unbelievable, bitter, tasteless most of the time, and seriously salty versions of cupcakes. They are actually very, very tasty, while cupcakes are boring, dull, monotonous, disgusting, untasty, bland, yucky, unbelievable, bitter, tasteless most of the time, and seriously salty versions of muffins.”
Maddie looked at Lyra, with an expression that said are you kidding me? “You have to be kidding me, Lyra. Muffins are boring, dull, monotonous, disgusting, untasty, bland, yucky, unbelievable, bitter, tasteless most of the time, and seriously salty versions of cupcakes, and you know it. There is absolutely no possible way that they could be boring, dull, monotonous, disgusting, untasty, bland, yucky, unbelievable, bitter, tasteless most of the time, and seriously salty versions of muffins. First of all they aren’t boring, dull, monotonous, disgusting, untasty, bland, yucky, unbelievable, bitter, tasteless most of the time, and seriously salty. But whatever. I am done with this conversation. Let’s finish our breakfast now, shall we?”
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